first heartbreak.

Brenna came up with Firsts on Fridays on giveagirlapen.com

this is what i wrote::
(true story, sadly…)

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All I can see through my blurry tears is his hand on top of mine, holding it tightly.
He is attempting to comfort me at the same time he’s causing me the worst pain I’ve ever experienced.

Doesn’t that mean something? He has to still care if he’s reaching out, right?
I try to convince him of this. I tell him he does still love me, he just needs to give me a chance. I haven’t even done anything wrong!

It doesn’t work….

He looks me right in the eye and says he ‘just doesn’t feel the same’ as he used to. What the heck? How does that happen?

Whatever. I finally understand he’s not going to change his mind, so I decide I’m going to be mad instead.

I look at him and just stare for a minute.
Although I’m angry, he’s still beautiful to me.
I want to memorize his face.

But not with that expression on it…. Pity. Screw you and your pity!

I snatch my hand out from under his, grab my bookbag off the floorboard, and get out of the car without a word.
I swing the heavy, old GTO door shut, and give him one last glance before I head up the porch steps.

He smiles at me. Smiles! While tears are streaming down my face!

I turn away, this time for good, and head inside to hide in my room for the rest of my life.
The pain is so horrible, I’m sure I won’t live through the night.
My heart won’t be strong enough.

I will never forget this moment. Ever.

I won’t.

By Eden on 03.27.09 11:57 pm |